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Basic Needs May 25, 2007

Posted by caveblogem in Blogs and Blogging, coffee, Dogs, memes, Other.

I was over at The Moon Topples this morning, checking up on Maht, and I found him doing this old meme that interested me (he got it from Good Thomas, but it has been bouncing around the intertubes for some time, apparently).  You take your first name and query Google with it thusly (including the quotation marks): “Firstname needs” and then hit “return.”  So I decided to do this thing.

My first name is Dane, which narrowed the scope of the answers somewhat.  Most of the sites used the word “Great” before my name, which is nice, flattering.  But I am modest.  The reason I got a Ph.D. was so that the word “Doctor” could be used before my name, thus keeping people from saying “great” all the time.  It was that or find a way to get knighted.  Anyway, there were still 2,500 or so hits.  What do I need?  What do all humans need?

First of all, I need shelter.  Something like half the answers had to do with shelter of some kind:

  • home
  • a New Home!
  • foster or forever home!
  • temp foster or perm home!
  • to Go Home
  • a home by this Friday

 Some were more specific than others, of course, with regard to location or type:

  • a large house with a big yard with a fence at least six feet high
  • home or transport in Missouri
  • home in SC
  • a good home
  • warm sleeping quarters
  • furnished room ASAP

And a few suggested that shelter was not as important an issue as location, which is one of the things that realtors say, too.  But I’m going to have to go with the overwhelming majority on this and disagree.  I may need “placing in Calif Bay Area,” or “to come to Indy,” but I assure you that it still gets cold there at night and during the winter.  And although I might need, after all, “to cum play in hammond, LA,” the playing would end at some point and it would be time to sleep.  The sites that claimed that I need “a place to stay while I am away” are absolutely correct.  At any rate, I have a house, and it is clear to me that I cannot do without it.  And I am thankful for the reminder to count my blessings. 

Next on my list of needs is food and exercise.  There is some disagreement about how much food, though, and how much exercise.

  • 3300 calories, not 6600
  • only a moderate amount of exercise
  • plenty of exercise, at the very least a long daily walk
  • more exercise

For some, the food and exercise weren’t enough, and they would have you believe that I need “a great deal of food and exercise,” plus “careful training when young.”  Well, it’s too late for that now, if so.  But some weren’t specific about exactly when the training had to be done but had something to say regarding how.

  • daily exercise and a persistent trainer
  • firm yet gentle training

Health care is important, too.  And many sites mentioned this need, some more specifically than others.

  • little coat care
  • a lot of preventive care
  • to be scared into going to doctors and the dentist
  • urgent hip surgery
  • special medical care
  • to be registered through OFA-Orthopedic Foundation for Animals

Everyone needs family, too, and some sites hit this theme, even suggesting particular requirements.

  • new family
  • to be treated as part of the family and introduced to as many normal daily occurrences as possible
  • a family who is willing to coach him in developing skills with his peers

Well, new family is always nice.  May I suggest a niece or nephew?  As to the other two, I think my family satisfies those requirements.  Finally, there were those needs that I found more difficult to classify:

  • ID tags and registration
  • to find a cheap car
  • a lift
  • a friend
  • time and patience with someone who already has experiences with dogs
  • to start his Dream
  • to jump-start his movie career
  • help
  • rescue
  • a Job
  • a Second Miracle
  • to break into Chuck’s lab and pee in his coffee
  • sites to photo odes
  • a wii
  • action
  • Your Help!
  • to do his time to pay for his crime
  • volunteers to help work at our information booth at the Juneteenth Festival this Saturday, June 17 in Penn Park
  • volunteers to help table and hand out literature for 1-hour or 2-hour shifts between noon and 5 p.m. on Sunday
  • to prove his innocence of a charge of sexual assault before he will propose a real marriage to his beloved

Some of these seem like needs and some seem like wants.  It is always hard for Americans to tell the difference, I suppose.  All I know is that Chuck better brew his own for a while.


1. silverneurotic - May 26, 2007

I’m sort of glad there’s no breed of dog that resembles my name.

2. Moon Topples - May 27, 2007

Poor Chuck!

Maslow would be proud at the seeming affirmation of his heirarchy.

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